Healthy relationships not only with others, but also with yourself. You have to take care of yourself, love yourself, and be kind to yourself before you can provide these things for someone else.
- Being open to learning more about yourself
- Acknowledging both your strengths and limitations
- Realizing how your actions affect others
- Challenging yourself to grow
How to take care of yourself:
- Love yourself unconditionally without being self-righteous or arrogant.
- Let go of blame if you have been hurt in the past; become empowered.
- Tend to your physical health through exercise, decent nutrition, and rest.
- Don't abuse yourself with tobacco, coffee, drugs, alcohol, or other substances which could hurt yourself or others, or impair your judgment.
- Replace negative thoughts and judgments with positive supportive ones.
- Treat yourself (and others) with respect, kindness, and compassion.
- Acknowledge that all human beings are fallible (that includes you), but capable of improvement and growth.
- Challenge unhealthy perceptions of yourself, step out of your box and consider new ways of looking at yourself, others, and your relationships.
How to be Your Own Best Friend
- MAKE A BASIC DECISION. Do you want to lift yourself up or put yourself down? Are you for or against yourself?
- CHOOSE TO DO THE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF.
- SEE THE WAYS YOU ARE PULLING YOURSELF DOWN. And decide that isn’t what you want to do.
- PRAISE YOUR OWN ACHIEVEMENTS. Relish it, dwell on it, give your self recognition.
- MEET YOUR OWN EXPECTATIONS. Ask yourself how you will feel if you put it off. If you sense you’ll be disgusted, do it now.
- DOING WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF IS THE OPPOSITE OF SELF-INDULGENCE. Satisfying your whole self includes the feeling and ties and responsibilities you have with others.
- FREEDOM IS ACCEPTING THE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR CHOICES.
- THINK ABOUT THE TIMES YOU WERE WISE, KIND, OR DOING WHAT YOU FELT GOOD ABOUT.
- INSTEAD OF CONVINCING YOURSELF BEFOREHAND THAT SOMETHING YOU WANT TO DO IS IMPOSSIBLE, SPEND YOUR ENERGY LOOKING FOR WAYS TO DO IT.
- LISTEN TO YOURSELF.
- ACCEPT THE MESSES AND THE MISTAKES.
Newman, M. & Berkowitz, B. (1971). How To Be Your Own Best Friend . Random House, Inc. : New York